As far as things go, we are in the home stretch. As of today, my wife is at 38 weeks. The nursery is becoming populated with baby items and the most adorable onesies in the history of onesies. My wife is experiencing all the kicks and shifts that babies do in the womb, which are very cool to watch. Child birth classes with likewise shell-shocked future parents are happening. Child birth books are being read… by my wife. I really should get on that.
I’m always asked how I feel about becoming a father. Sometimes I give a concrete answer but the reality is that I don’t know. I’m trying to keep an open mind. Don’t get me wrong; I truly am ready and will love this little girl. Despite all the conflicting advice we’re getting from parents (“don’t even set foot in a hot tub while pregnant” vs “of course you can and should go into a hot tub while pregnant”, “hospitals are terrible, it’s great you’re doing a home birth” vs “HOME BIRTH?! HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND!?”), one thing has been made clear: no one really knows the impact of parenthood until they’re there. So, I’m going to remain non-comittal as to my opinion on the impact this little person will have on our lives. However, I will definitely share my opinions once I’m there. For now, I will say that I am feeling a weird blend of “late in the game” and “ahead of the curve.” I have high school classmates who are already grandparents, but we’re the first of the close circle of friends here in Portland to have children. I joke that perhaps this will bring on a wave of fertility among the ladies.
A common topic of conversation about our baby is her multi-ethnic make up. Because of A’s generations-deep roots in Dallas, we joke that our child’s ethnicity will be Tex-Mex. We also always wonder which of us she’ll resemble the most. I’m pretty pale for a person of Mexican extraction, and my mother’s hair was blonde until she was 9, then went to brown until the last decade and now she’s blonde again. The latest ultrasound of our little tyke is inconclusive. She just looks like a sleeping infant in a Jean Cocteau film, half in shadow.